The parable that Luci Shaw created in her book Breath for the Bones: Art, Imagination, and Spirit: Reflections on Creativity and Faith, deeply resonated within my spirit. In it, she tells of the felling of a dead tree in the winter after the death of her beloved husband. The loss of the tree, the space it inhabited, it’s strength, branches, roots and the scar it left in the ground, all became a metaphor for the loss of her husband’s presence, strength, memories and her remaining wound. This God-given picture, a vision of sorts, was something tangible for her to hold on to. Shaw writes, “It was then I realized why the felling of the tree occupied my thoughts so consistently and with such a sense of significance. It was because I was the frozen sod with the deep wound, and Harold was my tree who was simply . . . gone.” I understood. My heart ached as I read this and tears flowed easily… again. It hasn’t been that long since the deaths of my mom, my father, my brother and my sister-in-law, all within the last three years. There were so many times I cried out to God questioning the need for such suffering of beloved, elderly parents; or the unfairness of cruel, debilitating, terminal illnesses of my wonderful siblings. I would pour out my heart to Him in whispers of desperation asking “really?” Sadness overwhelmed me, my faith pummeled by waves of grief. It was somewhere in that fog that I found a captivating prayer written by an ancient writer, Mechthild of Magdeburg, a medieval mystic nun from the 12th century.
“Lord, I will tear the heart of my soul in two
and You must lay therein.
You must lay yourself
in the wounds of my soul.”
Never before had I heard of His comfort in this way. Sometimes in grief the loneliness of that experience is overpowering. So the thought of the presence of God not only by my side, but actually laying into my broken heart, consoled me like nothing else. I hung on to that picture. He was my peace. I don’t pretend to understand the pain of losing a beloved spouse. But I have been deeply threatened by it. During that grieving period, my husband underwent a successful brain surgery to remove a benign tumor. As his sister simultaneously battled an aggressive brain cancer, fear would tiptoe into my resting moments and taunt my faith quietly until I could hear its boisterous, mocking laugh and I would have to get up and move my mind elsewhere, always repeating the name “Jesus.” Sometimes that’s all I could pray.
I feel deeply thankful to Luci Shaw for sharing her personal experience. But, more so, I am thankful that in her wisdom, she has taken what she has learned over the years to validate, confirm, and encourage the soul of the artist who is willing to see God’s metaphors. This is precisely how God works all things together for good. It brings to my mind one of my life verses (Luke 22:31-32). Where Satan has demanded permission to sift us like wheat through the storms of this life, Jesus himself prays for us so that our faith will not fail. And when we have turned out of our seasons of difficulty, we will share with our brothers and sisters to strengthen them. Luci Shaw is strengthening me. Without shame she acknowledges the powerful gift of metaphors, the ability to see them and create with them.
For years now, I have photographed, written, and spoken of the monarch butterfly. (Click on the ‘Monarch’ tab up at the top of this page.) I have seen God through the life cycle and metamorphosis of this amazing creature. He shows us a beautiful metaphor of the stages of our spiritual
transformation. Sometimes, as I’m speaking about monarchs, I get a few funny, or quizzical looks. People may think I look too deeply, care too much, or maybe I’m just too buggy or boring! But, I feel no shame in saying that I see God in monarchs and I never cease to be amazed at His faithfulness that he shows me through them.
Thank you to Luci Shaw for her powerful words of affirmation: ‘This is like that. In fact, in metaphor, “this” is “that.”’ Luci, I needed those words. Thank you.
I close with the most exciting moment… just as I was finishing this post today at 4:45pm; I caught sight of something familiar outside my window. I grabbed my camera and looked at my milkweed patch. The same milkweed patch that was accidentally sprayed with weed killer right before my son’s graduation open house in June. During this long awaited monarch season, I have not been able to find caterpillars or chrysalis on my milkweed. The eggs I found in early June met with demise, as the pesticides took effect. Sadly, I have seen no monarch butterflies. Until, I was writing this post…
...there He is again!
Patricia Spreng
Today, over at
The High Calling, I am joining new friends for the first time as we read, enjoy and strengthen each other in this book club hosted by
Laura Boggess . Thanks Laura!
Shaw, Luci (2009-09-01). Breath for the Bones (Kindle Locations 810-811). Thomas Nelson. Kindle Edition.
Shaw, Luci (2009-09-01). Breath for the Bones (Kindle Locations 676-678). Thomas Nelson. Kindle Edition.
